I was stunned (I kid you not) that editors at The New York Times didn’t find a way to slip the word “hulk” or even “avengers” into the Gray Lady’s latest feature on politics and the wild, wild world of Manhattan real-estate. Oh, and there is some religion news in here, somewhere.

What am I talking about?

Well, this week’s “Crossroads” podcast (click here to tune that in) focused on a story that ran with this dry, wordy, double-decker headline: “Why Mark Ruffalo and Wendell Pierce Are Fighting for a Crumbling Church — Congregants of the West Park Presbyterian Church, a Manhattan landmark, want it torn down and replaced by condos. Celebrities are joining the fight to save it.”

In the sprawling Marvel Comic universe, Ruffalo played that Big Green Guy. But you probably knew that.

Let’s work our way through this story, looking for evidence of the religion-beat story — it appears that zero religion-beat personnel were involved — that is at the heart of this story that the Times prelates see as a conflict about money, politics and, maybe, culture. Religion? Not so much.

In the podcast, I also noted that versions of this story are unfolding in urban areas around America, linked to the catastrophic decline of America’s mainline Protestant and the more Americanized versions of Roman Catholic life. What happens to their strategically located and very valuable urban sanctuaries?

The overture, which builds up to the sermon-esque thesis statement:

For years, a conflict over whether to tear down one of New York City’s historic churches, a 19th-century Romanesque Revival building on the Upper West Side, has been cast in epic terms, as a battle between the little people and big business.

In this case, however, those who see themselves as representing the little people include a growing list of New York celebrities.

And big business? That would be a real estate firm working with the tiny congregation of the West Park Presbyterian Church, which says it cannot afford to fix up the deteriorating building and hopes to sell it to a developer to build new luxury apartments on the site.

What has ensued is a perplexing tug of war for the moral high ground, set against the backdrop of a long-running conflict over who feels like they should have control over the city’s future.

There are, of course, quite a few forms of Presbyterian life in greater New York City. However, the Times editors see zero need to include any factual information about that.

Readers are told, early on, that this congregation is “tiny.” Eventually, readers learn that it has “about a dozen” members.

About a dozen? I was reminded of a time, years ago, when I turned in a Rocky Mountain News (RIP) story about a small, trendy protest march in downtown Denver (that editors had thought this event would be much larger). I reported that it drew “about 18” marchers. The city editor laughed, when she read that, and said: “Couldn’t you just COUNT them?”

Anyway, the church in this TImes story has “about a dozen members.” Clearly, we are not dealing with a branch of the massive, influential Redeemer Presbyterian Church founded by the late Rev. Tim Keller. Later readers are told:

West Park became known in the 1970s and 1980s as an early ally of the antiwar movement and L.G.B.T.Q. people, Mr. Leaf said.

Ah! These are the “good” Presbyterians, part of the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A). The story suggests that the local presbytery has been working hard to cash this check for several decades.

Let’s keep reading, as the New York City arts-and-entertainment forces enter the conflict:

“It’s about the people versus the corporations in this city,” as Mark Ruffalo, the actor and a church neighbor, put it at a public hearing this month. He was arguing in favor of saving the church building, which has been on the corner of Amsterdam Avenue and West 86th Street since the 1880s.

Roger Leaf, the chairman of the West Park Administrative Commission, which was created by the Presbytery of New York in 2020 to help the church manage the space and find a buyer, says the congregation of about a dozen people wants to stop its financial bleeding and use proceeds from the real estate deal for better causes, including serving needy people across the city.

“It’s ironic that the wealthy neighbors of this church, who have multimillion apartments, who have windows overlooking this space, are claiming that they are the little guys,” he said.

The actual story is long, complicated and bitter, involving a continuing lawsuit, several conflicting engineering assessments and accusations of bad faith from both sides. It is another example of how houses of worship, faced with declining membership, have turned to private development to rejuvenate themselves.

It might help to know more about the assets that these 12 Presbyterians are protecting, along with the building. What has been keeping this church alive?

Once again, there is a buried hint of religious content:

(The West Park congregation itself went virtual during the pandemic; another congregation, the Lighthouse Chapel, holds services there weekly.)

What is the “Lighthouse Chapel”? A few online searches suggested that this is probably an evangelical and/or charismatic congregation.

How many people attend this (possibly growing) church? How would they be affected? And, while we are asking questions, what is the seating capacity of this sanctuary? When was the last time “about a dozen” Presbyterians gathered there?

There is much more to read in this Times news feature, if one is interested in politics and money, alone. But I will end with two other items that caught my eye:

…. Mr. Leaf is optimistic. He said if the application was granted, a developer, Alchemy Partners, has already signed a contract that would pay the church more than $30 million to demolish the building and build luxury apartments there.

“That would fund food pantries, soup kitchens, warming centers, early childhood education centers, homeless shelters and so forth,” he said.

Alchemy would also pay the church $8 million to set up a new space in the building.

All of that is interesting, and valid content. Where would these other ministries be based?

Oh, but it is clear that the surviving congregation would receive $8 million — nearly $666,666 per current member — to “set up a new space” in the new condo complex.

That’s rather hard to imagine. Then again, would this be a new PCUSA mission? Would it be a “spiritual” facility with other purposes? After all, readers are told:

Mr. Ruffalo and others are mounting their own campaign to raise money for the building. One crowdsourced fund-raiser has raised about $16,000 toward their $250,000 target — including a $1,000 donation from Mr. Ruffalo.

“Without spaces like that, I would have never made it as an actor,” Mr. Ruffalo said. “Without these places, there is no theater in New York City.”

Ah, there is an organization based in this sanctuary that is known as the Center at West Park, it is a “secular, 501(c)3 not-for-profit organization” dedicated to “presenting diverse, engaging, and boundary-pushing artistic and cultural programming,” while “providing affordable performance, rehearsal, and event space to local artists and community members.”

I tried to find out the names of some of this “boundary-pushing” programs, without success. Clearly, this is an important angle in this story — since it appears to be linked to the support for this cause from the influential arts-and-entertainment avengers.

Why has this tiny, but strategically located, church received major attention from The New York Times?

Yes, there is that real-estate mantra — location, location, location. Strong support from LGBTQ+ and progressive causes (I would imagine that some rent space in the church building) didn’t hurt. In fact, I would go so far as to say that the odds are good that one or more Times journalists lives nearby and attends cultural events in this sanctuary.

Now, a word to readers and journalists in other urban areas. One way or another, this story is coming to your zip code.

Why? Call up a map of your downtown area and search for congregations linked to what sociologists call the “Seven Sisters” of the mainline world. That would be the Evangelical Lutheran Church in America, the Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.), the Episcopal Church, the American Baptist Churches USA, the United Church of Christ and the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ).

These historic denominations — and their strategically located sanctuaries — are beginning to be visited by the Grim Reaper.

Our own Ryan Burge (a mainline pastor) received quite a bit of feedback for a recent essay with this headline: “The Death of the Episcopal Church is Near.” And before death, there will be strategic closures and mergers, as seen in this Google search. I would love to know the value of the national Episcopal Church headquarters located at 815 2nd Avenue, near the United Nations building on Manhattan’s pricy East Side.

In recent decades, many of these urban churches have survived with the help of rent checks from progressive non-profits and even some government projects (since the doctrines of these denominations do not clash with government doctrines on hot-button moral issues).

But the clock is ticking and there is no painless way for these denominational leaders to cut their shrinking financial pies. At some point (ask many a United Methodist Church bishop who, in the near future, will be managing the land and assets of splintering congregations) checks will need to be cashed and trust funds will be reallocated.

Stay tuned.

Enjoy the podcast and, please, pass it along to others.

FIRST IMAGE: The Hulk and the other Avengers, in a movie publicity photo, fight to protect valuable urban real estate.